We are a gay Tampa couple. Here’s what same-sex marriage meant to us:

If you’ve heard this, stop us: two closet gay boys attend the same Catholic high school in Long Island, New York, attend another university, go out as gay, reconnect and start dating at age 19, become inseparable. They moved to Tampa, got married, began posting about their lives and relationships on Tiktok and Instagram accounts, and now there are plenty of people sharing a window into the world with over 150,000 followers.

It’s a unique story, but it’s our story. Over the past 18 years, we are grateful to have found each other in our youth and supported each other through milestones in our lives.

One of the milestones we’ve been thinking about these days is getting married. Later this month marks the 10th anniversary of the Supreme Court’s landmark Obergefell ruling. We got engaged shortly after that decision and asked many questions from our family about the wedding. We encouraged them to see our wedding as a celebration of our relationships and ours, as well as the equal rights of LGBTQ+ people. We are not just the title of husbands in terms of the meaning of marriage, but also the shared future that comes with respect, recognition and the associated shared future.

Understanding LGBTQ+ equality has been a journey for our deep Catholic family. But our siblings, parents and grandparents have traveled mostly in the right direction. Early on, we were sometimes considered friends rather than boyfriends. But it existed for years and showing love has changed those dynamics. Now we are people who are looking for advice and insights on life and relationships, and it was truly heartwarming.

One of our favourite moments with Ryan’s family was when we all went out to a local pride parade near our hometown. Our young nie and ne came with us and everyone was wearing rainbow themed shirts. It made us feel like we’re including as a family and meant seeing our loved ones passionate, supportive and simply moving beyond “acceptance.”

The journey we had in our family isn’t that different from what our country exists. When the conversation on marriage equality first began in the early 2000s, public support was terrible. 33% of Americans said same-sex couples were married. It’s been a complete reversal ever since. Almost 70% of Americans support the marriage of same-sex couples. As more LGBTQ+ people came out and shared their stories, more Americans grew up realizing that we are your neighbors and fellow community members.

It is clear that the country has moved ahead, even among those who do not support marriage equality. This year there have been many headlines about state legislatures seeking to pass a resolution encouraging the Supreme Court to overturn Obergefell, but none of them have passed, even in highly conservative states. It speaks volume. The law is clear and resolved, and whatever your personal beliefs are, it’s time to let people do.

Today, hundreds of thousands of same-sex couples live, build families and serve the community just like everyone else. It’s a bit surprising to think about it. Because when we were starting a relationship, it didn’t feel we had a clear roadmap. There were not many expressions or examples to follow.

That’s partly why we started sharing our lives online. Through Tiktok and Instagram account @nhieguys (“I’ve never been” guys – because we’re always looking for new experiences), we highlight the best tampa and our various trips. Two guys who share about restaurants, places they want to see, and more have grown into a community of friends and followers that lead to our joy, relationships, and love for where we live.

We are proud to share our lives this way. And I hope that when others see our posts, they see positive examples of what happens when you live your authentic and happy.

Ryan Sullivan and Nicholas Catania live in Tampa.