Hello, here’s a woman.
Sorry to leave the line, but the man needs help. The ongoing conflict between two of the country’s most powerful men has brought the attention of the Federation of Women’s Agents of Acting (FAFO).
President Donald Trump and his special friend Elon Musk have navigated conscious separation, spreading gossip and leaving each other with almost passive, offensive messages on social media. You know. It’s for men.
In these chaotic times, we are fortunate to be in charge of a stable man’s appearance when the country crosses those who have the right to live in this land. Women have never held presidency in America despite several attempts. This is because we are hysterical. Our mood swings and mental properties are controlled by how the moon and tide interact with the lining of the uterus. Also chanting the ritual during the luteal phase. We all want chocolate and absolute power in our cottages, wah, wah, wah, snickers, tears!
The point is that women cannot trust them to lead with a stable hand. But just as we need spending allowances from our husbands to calm down around the rack of sandals, men need us too. And it’s not just about recreating the Earth.
Boys, listen to boys. Because there is advice on how to win a war of mutilated romance like a girl. Here’s how you can navigate the rocky path of disbandment directly from the FAFO playbook.
First, let me feel the pain. Breathe your golden mansion shallowly, go there emotionally, probably wearing your original old Tesla T-shirt. Invite your friends – who got Ted Cruz in divorce? Is there anything going on with Ron DeSantis?
Know that with the shock of parting, some desperate attempts to reconcile. Running backs are normal, but ultimately prolongs the pain. For example, you can seek a common foundation of deporting vulnerable people, harassing travelers at airports, destroying their families, and sharing their interests in California. But just as all women can tell you, change is inevitable. Sit in the discomfort of your new loneliness and fill your time with soft, female hobbies like knitting knitting and painting.
Never unearth the exact cause of your relationship’s end. Certainly, I point to discussions about budgeting, differences in philosophy, and the colour of baseball caps. I spend weeks playing conversations and looking at my photos while pretending to be someone else. These actions are merely symptomatic of the fact that you weren’t suitable for each other, even if you love deploying Marines in American soil.
Look at your waistline. If you gain weight and naturally gain age, then no one wants you. Wait a second, it’s us alone. continue.
It brings us to the final point. Every member of FAFO knows that winning a breakup means success, prosperity, moisturizing and bothered success. Maybe you’ll link to a hot new, quirky billionaire. Maybe you’ll find a big, beautiful new candidate who will make eye contact over time.
Maybe in a few years, they’ll meet on the street outside the coffee shop where military mask members are trapped. Each holds a latte and you exchange quiet smiles. “Do you want to get a croissant?” one of you will say. “Yes,” the other reply. “Wait, no. No. And you part ways, press the phalanx of armed soldiers and know in your heart you will truly pray for each other for the best hope. Finally.
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